I love music. I love harmonies and melodies, I love guitars and strings and I'm a real sucker for a string section. But more than that I love lyrics. Maybe pop lyrics are to me what poetry is to more sophisticated. There's a lyric that's been on my mind recently- "how many times have we slept side by side a thousand miles apart" it's from a Just Jack song called No Time. And the line makes me think of how as Christians our lives can be with God.
You see the lone I guess refers to how couples can lie in bed together side by side, but can have drifted apart from each other so much emotionally that really although in the physical they couldn't be closer somewhere deeper they couldn't be further apart.
I'm gonna be honest here, sometimes that's how it is with me and God. I've done quite a bit of Christian activities this summer; kids clubs, youth events, church things, worship things. But somehow in the midst of serving God I've forgotten what it is to know him. To want him. You see sometimes we surround ourselves with Christians and get busy doing stuff 'for God' and we have prayer times and good times and we can feel we are really loving God. But sometimes God himself can get left out. Sometimes we are so busy trying to serve God we stop falling in love with him. We stop becoming more like him. Stop seeking him. Stop doing all the things he actually wants us to do. I'm there.
About 4 years ago I read a book called Blue Like Jazz and it changed my life. It was the story of one mans journey with God, and at one point in it Donald (the author) says he was always struck by people who talked about God like they really new him. Intimately. I want to be one of those people. But I realised in a group prayer time recently I had stopped praying like I knew God, I talked to him like a distant friend, trying to feel what it was that once made me love my friend. In a group prayer time. At an outreach week.
"how many times have we slept side by side a thousand miles apart"
I want to fall fully in love with God again. I want to know him. I want to serve out of love not because it's what I'm meant to do.
I guess I'm on a journey, and it's about to get interesting....